NIAW Feature: Finding Community

Rebekah Rosler, photographed by Alexis Mera. Shirt Design by Ko Im.

Rebekah Rosler is a professional licensed master social worker (LMSW) and therapist, who has always had a passion to lift others. That passion became a mission after Rebekah’s own fertility experience. Rebekah has used her strength and voice to create (the Warriors) community for other women on their (in)fertility journeys by creating a safe, online community of support and empowerment.

Read on to learn more!

Rebekah’s story

Interestingly enough, I never thought that I wanted children. I spent my life making sure that I could not and would not get pregnant… Only to find out that when I met my husband and my life changed, I wanted children. I also discovered that I wouldn’t be able to (without assistance). In retrospect, it makes sense to me because there had been fertility challenges for both my mother and grandmother. I didn’t think that children would be on my life path so I hadn’t really thought about it much before (that point).

I met my husband at 33, we got married at 35, then tried to get pregnant for a few months. When we didn’t have success, we wanted to proactively find out if everything was alright. Per the recommendation of my doctor, I got a HSG (hysterosalpingogram), and found out that one of my Fallopian tubes was blocked. That meant that every other month my chances of a pregnancy were at zero. As a result, we decided to seek (medical) help right away.

I had heard about good outcomes from New Hope so decided to go there. The reality is that although I got the desired results I was looking for, I saw my doctor once in the three years that I was there. All communications were through the nurses and through email correspondence. Initially, my protocol was as follows, month one: timed intercourse, month two: medicated intercourse, and month three: IUI. When that didn’t result in a pregnancy, we took the doctor’s counsel of doing Mini IVF. (The focus of Mini-IVF is quality over quantity.)

In my first round of Mini-IVFI got six eggs, five made it to the blastocyst stage. I transferred two freshly at day three, and froze three. One of those two embryos transferred stuck and became my now three year old daughter. A year later, I transferred two embryos that were day 5 and 6, getting pregnant with twins.

I realized that my experience gave me the ability to start create a community and start a group (called Warriors) to support others on their journeys. Having run Warriors (closed Facebook group) for over three years and seeing the years of struggle, sadness, heartache, and financial distress, I am aware that every (in)fertility journey is unique. I was lucky to have conceived quickly after treatment with the outcome of having healthy babies. Although my journey wasn’t filled with heartache, I had to go through it myself to understand the importance of talking about (in)fertility, and how to support others going through it.

What did you learn from your journey?

I never wanted kids, decided I wanted kids, took action immediately and got lucky. I never had the true struggles that so many people go through with (in)fertility. What I had was a life changing experience that allowed me to support and help other women (during pre-conception). It introduced me to a different version to help and support women during their experiences which were more often overwhelming, challenging, disheartening and at times tragic. It also allowed me to create a career to continues that platform of support through Mom MeetUps.

After starting Warriors, I started Mom MeetUps to help women on their journey of motherhood. My fertility experience was my initial earth shattering, aha moment that showed me that what I was called to do, was to help people through their fertility journeys. That lent itself to supporting the motherhood journey later on.

Your high?

I feel so lucky that I got pregnant and have a three year old daughter, that I am mildly obsessed with. My next high after a terrible pregnancy, was carrying two incredible babies to term and having a healthy labor. After all three of them were born, my third high was leaving my paying career to create a company to help other women along their journey. Through the means that I had, I was able to offer support groups to the Warriors group, and also create tailored Mom meet-ups to those who had fertility challenges prior to conceiving and then had a baby, twins, or multiples. We have since created meet-ups for single, first-time, second-time, stay at home, and working moms, as well.

My educational background is in social work and I always knew that I wanted to be a therapist or help in some way. My own fertility journey brought me to this; health and women on the path towards creating their family. I had always been on the “this is what I am supposed to do” track; from high school, college, to graduate school, without intention or true personal passion. I put one foot in front of the other until this happened to me. This gave me the ability to do something for others and hold their hand through their journey. Being able to add any light to this dark place has been incredibly rewarding.

Do you have a silver lining?

Perhaps the silver lining was the group created for women who are hoping to be, or are already moms, to have a safe space to share personal experiences. I have heard that the Warriors community has been helpful because even women who are desperately trying to become moms are still able to support each other when they are going through some of the most trying times in their own lives. Warriors (group) has proven to be a place that people come for kindness, to share, seek resources and support. There is something that needed to exist in this (fertility) space that didn’t before.

Your truth?

Even when our stories go exactly the way that we envisioned or hoped, having a group of other women that are there to support, empower and show kindness, has made all of the difference. I have learned that it is not only about us, it’s just as much about participating in a greater community.

Rebekah is a 30-something infertility warrior, mom to three babies (a 3-year-old and a set of twins), Licensed Master Social Worker, doula, and co-Founder of Mom MeetUps. Rebekah leverages her blog bexhasbabies.com, social channels and Warriors group to share her experiences and help normalize the message of infertility, breastfeeding and postpartum challenge.

If you are looking for a community to support your or a friend’s (in)fertility journey, please reach out to hi@fertilust.com to be connected with Rebekah’s safe Facebook group called Warriors.

NIAW Feature: Faces of (In)fertility

Photo by Alexis Mera. Shirt design by Erin Halper.

At first glance it would be hard to detect that Stephanie Rapp is a fertility warrior. Stephanie is young, beautiful, vivacious and currently pregnant. And while Stephanie is entirely transparent about her story and the challenges on her path to building her family, you would probably assume that she sneezed and got pregnant. During our interview, Stephanie shares how (in)fertility has many faces and also affects young women. Read on to find out why we should never judge a book by its cover.

Stephanie’s story

My story began when I went on the pill at age 15, and was on it for the next 10 years. Fast forward to high school and college, where I struggled to maintain 100 lbs and hard a hard time putting on weight. After UPenn, I went into finance, working at Goldman Sachs in Fixed Income sales & trading, (through the financial crisis) for eight years. Soon after starting at Goldman Sachs, I was working 14 to 20 hour days and feeling the immense stress and pressure of the job and culture, (which were exacerbated by the climate of the time), and I stopped getting my period. My OBGYN, who I saw at the GS health center, reassured me that it was normal to not get a period while on the pill. After witnessing fertility struggles of people close to me, I decided to take my health into my own hands.

I went searching for a good OBGYN, I started making changes to try and get a cycle back and I went off of the pill. A year after going off of the pill, my situation was still the same. I was still very slender, still working intensely in a highly stressful environment, still working out regularly, still going out often. And still without a period.

I was sent for ultrasounds, CAT scans, MRIs, rounds, and rounds of blood work and more, to no avail. My hobby and passion is nutrition so I enrolled in nutrition school in hopes that I could also find out how to get my body functioning. I changed the way that I ate (bone marrow and collagen, ghee and egg yolks, kombu and kefir, grass fed steaks and cheese), and the way I worked out (yoga and walks, pilates and rest days). I added in acupuncture and supplements. And I started to notice positive changes in the right direction. But when my husband and I got married and started to try for a baby, I never, not once, in many months had a positive ovulation test.

I felt called to share my journey with other women who, surprisingly (had experiences which) were not dissimilar. So many of my colleagues also were experiencing amenorrhea or had suffered infertility. One day, after opening up about my struggles, a friend suggested that I see her fertility specialist. My then OBGYN told me to try for a year because I was so young before proceeding down any alternate paths. I had little to lose so I went to the specialist (that my friend recommended), and within an hour she had honed in on my issue and created a path towards pregnancy.

Patches, pills, shots and six weeks later, I was pregnant with Olivia (now four years old)! Seven months after having Olivia, I went back to my fertility specialist. Four weeks later I was pregnant with Cullen (now almost three years old)! Fast forward again, I went back for number three. A few cycles in I was pregnant again, but at eight weeks had a miscarriage. I elected for a DNC days after the diagnosis which ended up being a lifesaving decision because my pathology determined that I had a molar pregnancy, placental tumor.

Had I waited to miscarry naturally, I likely would have had to have a much more invasive procedure followed by a year or more of chemo(therapy). Instead, I suffered through a long and scary six months of constant blood work to ensure the tumor was not growing back coupled with the most intense fatigue, fog, exhaustion, lack of fervor and joy. Total depletion. I was desperate to feel like me again, but was grasping at straws. Again, I went for blood work and tests and labs; to find nothing. I treated myself with alternate therapies, supplements and nutrients, rest and support, eventually coming out of the hole I was living in after six months. I'm now pregnant with number three, due early July! 

I started a wellness company, EMBODY Wellness Company just over four years ago. We are a holistic wellness and lifestyle concierge, who create customized wellness programs for our individual and corporate clients. Our goal is to clear through the clutter and help our clients accomplish (more than) their goals in a sustainable and lasting way. We specialize in fertility, pre and post-natal and getting your body back after baby, as well as weight-loss, gut repair, clean home and beauty makeovers, corporate workshops, events, talks and more! We also do wellness business consulting for budding companies and practitioners. I am inspired by my work and our clients and love being able to help others on their journey to embody wellness!

Your high?

Each positive pregnancy test and then the highest high, holding my healthy babies! 

Your low?

The molar pregnancy rocked me to my core. It was emotionally sad and taxing, and it physically crushed me too. Feeling joy was too exhausting. I struggled to stay in the moment and enjoy the happiness around me. Even laughter was a strain. And my two kids are so funny! I felt despair and helplessness and uncertainty that the future would clear up. The road ahead seemed rocky and unreliable. My medical bills were crazy. (My insurance covered zero percent. Not even my DNC and all of the prescription hormones that I was on for well over a year.) I felt horrible physically and mentally, and felt even worse about that emotionally. I felt guilty about not being "me" for my kids and husband who needed my support and help, and I was just so so tired all of the time. 

Do you have a silver lining? 

This is a tough question. I think I'll be able to answer that more genuinely when I hold baby number three and see that he is healthy and here! A friend recently told me the timing is great because my older two are at ages where they are so excited for baby and cannot wait to be big siblings. They are thrilled to have responsibilities and teach their little brother their favorite songs, how to eat food, pick out his diapers and clothes. They will both be in preschool so I'll have good 1:1 time with the little guy. 

I truly believe I’m an optimist but I think that some parts of infertility are not lined in silver. I didn't need to have a placental tumor (to learn a lesson or appreciate something else). I don't want anyone else to go through that. I'd much prefer every woman have a linear path to motherhood. In the end, my third healthy child will be the silver lining. That's the most important outcome. 

Do you have any words of wisdom?

There are many ways of becoming a mother. Sometimes, ways we don't plan for or expect. But trust that you will hold your baby one day, maybe after an easy and natural conception, maybe through IVF, or even surrogacy or adoption. But, If you want to be a mom, you will be. 

I also want to add that most importantly that this is your journey and your life. Allow yourself to feel however you fee; mad, frustrated, sad, defeated, joyous, excited, hopeful. Whatever your emotions, they are real and don't need to be explained or justified. Give yourself the time and space to feel and heal how you need. And you don't have to do it alone! seek help from friends, professionals, (this growing) community, family, a journal, whatever you need. Reach out and let others in! You are not expected to be the expert on everything, and you are not failing.

Stephanie, her husband and two (soon to be three!) children live in NYC. If Stephanie isn’t creating meals from her farmers market finds for her family, friends or EMBODY Wellness clients, you can find her dancing and singing along with her kids as they rehearse the complete soundtrack to Frozen. To learn more about Stephanie, please visit EMBODY Wellness or follow @embodywellnesscompany on Instagram.

NIAW Feature: Options are Valuable

Anthea King-Pascual captured by Alexis Mera. Shirt designed by Kayla Kleinman.

I had the opportunity to sit down with fertility warrior, Anthea King-Pascual to discuss her journey of secondary (in)fertility, IVF and the relief she found in the egg donor option. Read on to find out how Anthea is redefining the conversation around (in)fertility through her story of loss, heartache and love.

Anthea’s story:

I got pregnant with my daughter when I was 35 after three months of trying. When I was 37 and my daughter was one, we tried again for a second. We got pregnant after trying for a while and discovered at five months that the fetus had trisomy which meant it wouldn’t be a viable pregnancy. We then turned to IVF and after four times, had an ectopic pregnancy that resulted in a miscarriage, DNC, and chemotherapy to flush out my fallopian tubes. After the ectopic, we took the mandatory break from treatment for six months.

We decided to try (IVF) again by bundling embryos over three more rounds (of retrievals) and banked a total of 11. Our embryos were sent for genetic testing and every single one came back abnormal.

I was now 42 years old. Our insurance had been covering up to 80% up until that point and we were about to go entirely out of pocket. We consulted with our Reproductive Endocrinologist (RE) and he shared that the chances of a viable pregnancy was about 1% based on my age and our history. As a result, our RE recommended that we consider the egg donor route which I hadn’t really thought about up until that point.

We decided to move forward and initially had two failed attempts with possible egg donor candidates. As a result, we decided to go the frozen rather than fresh egg donation route and purchased multiple eggs from one donor. The first egg that we transferred resulted in my son, Simon!

The media gives a false sense of expectation and hope by covering celebrities who get pregnant at 45 or 50. It is very likely that these pregnancies could be the result of donor eggs. It’s so important to voice the option about leveraging donor eggs. In fact, our clinic, RMA NJ does approximately 2,000 egg donor transfers a year!

What was your high?

My high was making the decision and the plan to go the egg donor route. It was the hope in knowing that there was an option (to have a baby), and that it wasn’t the end of the road for us. It wasn’t the original way we thought that we were going to (have a baby), but it was the way that it happened for us.

What was your low?

The low over my entire journey was after banking multiple eggs over three cycles. After all the emotions, medications and money, and then finding out that none of them were viable. My husband and I felt completely defeated.

Do have a silver lining?

My husband. He was so supportive of everything that I was doing, wanted to do, and the decisions that I made. I felt like I really wanted to have another child and give my daughter a sibling.

I knew that I married the right man because we hit rock bottom and were able to get through it together by supporting each other. I know my husband very well but we had never been in this situation before. There is no way of knowing how a partner may be or react during an extremely trying experience, and he was beyond supportive.

Do you have any words of wisdom?

I think that it is important to remember that there are options. I remember someone sharing with me that “only you are going to know when/if you need to change your path”. Be honest with yourself and don’t give up hope. Consider going about the process a different way such as donor egg or adoption. It could save you a lot of heartache, time and money.

People also question whether they could love their (donor egg) child as much as their biological child. Speaking from experience, the answer is YES, you most definitely love that child just as much!

Anthea, her husband and her two children live in New Jersey. Anthea’s love for her children’s care and safety inspired her to launch Homepaired, the first online marketplace connecting families with motivated and talented American students, with the goal of making live-in childcare affordable, accessible and ethical.

Trailblazing with Andrea Syrtash

Photo of Andrea Syrtash by Alexis Mera.

During National Infertility Week, Alexis Mera and I had the opportunity to meet with six fertility warriors who have been bold enough to share their stories publicly. Please meet Andrea Syrtash a fertility force and trailblazer. Although I have known Andrea for years, our first in person meeting was only very recently when our group of fertility warriors got together for this NAIW project.

Andrea has been a trailblazer in the fertility space and has been actively supporting fertility warriors since she founded pregnantish, the first online lifestyle magazine dedicated to helping singles, couples and LGBT navigate (in)fertility treatments. Andrea’s background as a relationship expert and coach regularly featured on national TV shows including Good Morning America and The Today Show, and as the author of He's Just Not Your Type (And That's A Good Thing) and Cheat On Your Husband (With Your Husband), combined with her compassion for the fertility journey, has made her an unwavering authority in the world of fertility.

I had the privilege to connect with Andrea on some of the aspects of her personal journey that I am so pleased to share in our recent interview here:

Andrea, what is your story?

How much time do you have?! Approximately 18 fertility treatments, one open-stomach surgery to remove a large fibroid, eight years of trying to get and stay pregnant, and eight reproductive doctors. I always knew it might take a while to get pregnant because I was diagnosed with endometriosis as a teenager, but I never imagined that it would take as long as it did to meet our baby (in December 2018)! 

After IVF transfer after transfer, and after learning we miscarried a 'heatlhy' baby in 2013 after a D&C, a doctor told me not to do anymore embryo transfers until we genetically tested our embryos. In 2016, I did many more retrievals to try to create enough Day 5 embryos to send away for PGS (now called PGT-A) genetic testing. Once we had healthy embryos, we knew we should try to find a gestational carrier (a surrogate who would use my embryo) to carry our baby to term.

This was another big chapter! Two surrogates dropped out on us and I had no idea how we were going to afford to keep going through this. In January 2018, my first cousin Elana stepped up and offered to carry our embryo. I was so emotional I couldn't respond! We transferred one into her in April 2018, during National Infertility Awareness Week. I remember telling my audience at pregnantish that I had no idea if I'd meet our baby this way, but I was hopeful. In December of 2018 of my cousin delivered our baby girl Arielle (into the world). I'm so grateful and in shock that I'm her mom!

Your High?

I created and launched pregnantish.com to help others navigate this incredibly stressful process right in the middle of my own treatment/IVF. At the time, I was not sure if or how I'd have a baby. Finding a deeper purpose during an experience I was really struggling with was a high for me.I was not only able to use my voice to help others, but I learned so much from others in the community. So often when you're dealing with infertility, you feel alone.

Your Low? 

I had many lows over almost a decade of trying to make a baby! One happened in public at a department store after an appointment where the doctor told me my embryos were growing unevenly. (I later learned it's because I needed estrogen priming, but that's another story!)  A tourist came up to me and asked if she could pray for me. I felt awkward about it, right there in the middle of the shoe racks; we held hands and she prayed while I cried. Another low was learning that I would miscarry again in 2014. By this point, I had been trying for about 4 years and I was so depleted. December 2015 was another low because my doctor told me that I had a 'beautiful perfect looking embryo', that didn’t take. I had done everything (diet, vitamins, taking care of myself) to let it implant. When it didn't work, I felt hopeless. I called the doctor and he told me to stop treatment and suggested more testing.

What was a low then turned out to be a high because more possibilities opened for us once we got more information (as a result of the testing).

Do you have a silver lining?

I got 2 babies out of this! One is my baby Arielle, who I'm so grateful for and who is a joy. The other is pregnantish which is fulfilling because I often hear it helps others who are struggling.

Do you have any words of wisdom?

I used to tell myself and often tell our readers that so much is out of our control when it comes to goals like parenthood, and if you want to be a parent, there will be a path. You don't need to know the how, the when, the where, you just need to know the what which is that you will be a parent. There are so many paths...

Learn more about Andrea, her story and the wealth of fertility resources available through her site pregnatish.

The Nurse we all Need

I am so excited to share the discussion that I had with Fertility Nurse and Consultant, Leyla Bilali of Fertility Together.  Leyla bridges the gap between doctor visits, the waiting, the results and so much more.

It is no secret that (in)fertility is a lot to navigate both mentally and physically. Leyla’s services combine emotional support with the medicine that's within her scope of practice. It’s also a huge bonus that Leyla helps her patients with the administration of their medicine in the comfort of their own home and is also a constant sounding board. The result is that Leyla’s patients are much more than just that, they are individuals who receive support tailored to their needs during their fertility journey. 

Read on to find out more about the discussion that I had with Leyla, the Fertility Nurse that we all need.  I have come to think of Leyla is a fertility fairy godmother. Everyone going through fertility treatments needs a Leyla!

What is a fertility consultant and what inspired you to become one?

 A fertility consultant holds your hand during your fertility journey. This doesn’t necessarily have to just be for IVF but for all fertility related treatments including egg freezing. I work with some women that aren’t in a secured relationship or ready to have a child yet, but would like the option to potentially have a child in the future. From egg freezing to IVF, I help women navigate the whole process from who to see and what tests to take for baseline testing.

Sometimes an OB will suggest that a patient should see a reproductive endocrinologist, especially if a couple has been trying without success for over a year. I can guide that person on who to see based on their personalized medical history rather than just send them to a clinic where there is a relationship (between the OB and the clinic). A lot of this (fertility) world is not personalized. There is such a high volume at the large clinics which has its pros, but it makes it difficult to personalize care for people. My role is to help guide through all of the results and keep my patients sane.

I believe that a nurturing, knowledgeable partner like me can make all the difference as someone discovers their unique path to fertility. In my 11 years as a registered nurse, six of them in pediatrics, and five of the most recent in fertility, I have learned how to make healthcare more comfortable and human by inserting my compassion, humor and reliability.

 The medical world can feel very stiff and scary and we often need a shoulder to lean on to get through it. This is especially true for fertility patients as they are usually in a vulnerable state to begin with. Whether you are simply curious about your reproductive health, ready to take action via egg freezing or struggling with infertility, it doesn't get much more emotional, raw or intimate than this. And because of this intimacy, it's often hard for people to talk about it. As a society, we are beginning to lift the taboo of fertility but we still have a ways to go!

I have been fortunate enough to recognize my calling as a fertility consultant at the suggestion of some of my most dear patients. I thought I was supporting them medically and emotionally, and instead I was the one that was rewarded ten-fold with a great business idea. It actually occurred to me while I was at the home of one of my patients assisting her with injections. Sometimes the patient or the partner has a hard time administering or doesn’t feel comfortable.

I realized what was missing in fertility care when my patient said “I don’t know how people do this without a Leyla. You should start your own business.” No one else was doing this in the Tri-State area so I officially launched Fertility Together in August of 2017.

You mentioned personalization for each patient. Can you please elaborate?

 After looking at a patient’s medical history and understanding their personality, I make recommendations on who that patient would work well with and provide A – Z assistance from injections to on-call support. Even if it isn’t the full IVF, egg freezing is still the first full part of IVF by way of egg retrieval. I can assist the patient on what to expect from the medications and help administer it, if needed. 

What is your view on the correlation between stress and conceiving?

 Stress wreaks havoc on your body so there is no reason that it wouldn’t wreak havoc on your reproductive system and egg quality. 

 Cortisol (stress) hormones compete with progesterone hormones. Progesterone is crucial to pregnancy, specifically to conceiving and holding a pregnancy. There are a lot of indications that stress plays a role in infertility.

 One method that I like to combat stress is acupuncture. There may not be any direct studies that acupuncture increases egg quality but it does affect your nervous system, which can suppress your stress levels. JAMA recently released a report on an acupuncture study where some patients received traditional acupuncture and others received a placebo of randomly placing needles. The result showed no difference between the traditional and the placebo. However, because the participants felt that they were proactively doing something to alleviate their stress, the positive IVF outcomes were increased. 

What do you most regularly hear your patients “stress” about leading up to and during IVF treatment?

The anxiety from the medication and injections. The partner relationship also plays a huge role (of importance) because that is your support system and any potential lack of it, can also be a source of stress.

What are your top tips for patients to optimize positive outcomes and reduce stress?

1. Taking care of your body is huge. If you have an eating disorder, are under or overweight, you are damaging your reproductive system. You can improve egg quality and support it with good whole foods, decreasing alcohol consumption, and not smoking.

2. It is important to work with a doctor that you vibe and feel comfortable with. The doctor and the facility should be available to answer questions. You should not ever feel like a bother for asking.

3. Communication between you and your partner is crucial. We often forget that our partner is going through this too and that they have (support) needs as well. Maybe you need a third party like me or an IVF therapist to help.

4. Do what makes you feel sane; that could be acupuncture, exercise, or another healthy activity.

Are there any myths about stress that you would like to debunk?

 Prior to transferring an embryo, I have a lot of a patients who ask if the timing is right and if stressful life events will alter their results. For example they have a stressful work week coming up or life just happened. The answer is no. If the embryo is going to take and it’s going to be a viable pregnancy, it’s going to sustain despite your everyday level of stress and anxiety. 

There is nothing wrong with being stressed and anxious about this process. That is why it is annoying when people say “don’t stress or just relax”. I think that it would be abnormal if someone didn’t stress or have anxiety during the process. Letting yourself feel these emotions is where my services come in. I am a sounding board. You get to tell me that you are stressed out and just talking about it will make you feel better. 

Are there any resources that you think are a must for anyone going through or considering IVF?

• Acupuncture, Liz Carlson at Common Point. I go to her myself!

• IVF therapists

• Resolve.org offers a resource list for consultants, therapists, support groups

I would love to get to the point where people don’t feel ashamed that they had to undergo any fertility treatment to have their baby. Ideally it would be normalized and not a taboo topic.

What moment in your career has inspired you more than you could have imagined?

I was chatting with my husband’s colleague at a holiday party who knew that I am a fertility nurse, and upon meeting me shared that he was an IVF baby. He told me that he was so appreciative of what his mom went through to have him. It brought tears to my eyes.

Leyla Bilali, BS, BSN, RN is an experienced fertility nurse and fertility consultant. Leyla received her Bachelor of Science in Biology at Emory University, and her BSN at the Columbia University School of Nursing. 

To learn more about Leyla and Fertility Together, please visit: fertilitytogether.com or @fertilitytogether on IG.

Learning how to lead a Nutritious Life with Keri Glassman

I realized after some initial setbacks with my fertility that nutrition held the keys to the kingdom that I was looking for.  I became convinced that what I put in my body would ultimately help me achieve conception.  I got to reading books on foods for fertility and met with a couple of nutritionists, but ultimately knew that I just wanted to be more educated on the subject.  (Maybe the Type A in me?)  Cue Keri Glassman and The Nutrition School (TNS).  The courses not only solidified my understanding of nutrition, but also gave me a “wholistic” view on health, wellness, and nutrition.  Thanks to Keri and TNS, I am now Nutritious Life Certified and accredited by the American Association of Drugless Practitioners.

You may have heard about Keri… she is a nationally recognized celebrity nutritionist, registered dietician, healthy cooking expert, published author, and the founder of Nutritious Life and The Nutrition School.  Or you may have seen Keri on TV; she has been tapped as an expert to speak on The Today Show, Good Morning America, The View, The Talk, The Chew, Dr. Oz, and much more. 

I was recently fortunate enough to snag some time with Keri to discuss how her life was destined to be a nutritious one.  Read on to find out how you too can glean some important tips on leading your most nutritious life!

How do you spend most of your time?

Good question.  Every day varies but there are a few things that I do to keep my schedule consistent despite travel and projects.  I always take a look at my week and assess what I am doing with my kids, when I am having my family time, and what are the fun and exciting things that we are doing together based on their schedule.  I also always try to be home for breakfast unless I have early morning TV (interviews), as well as dinners to spend time with them.  Breakfast and dinner together is a huge part of our day. 

When you are your own boss and someone is not telling you where to be all day, it can lead to lack of structure and productivity.  I am an early riser and am my best in the morning so try to tackle one big project on my list between 5:30am and 7am.  That gives me a little bit of time for myself, plus a bit of time to organize and map out the day.  I pause, have breakfast with the kids, and when they go to school, I get my workout in.  Then I try to block out time to get in computer time (writing my own content, doing research) until around 1pm to harness my most productive hours.  I take the time after that to power through media interviews, calls, and meetings.  I find that I am better in those situations because I have crossed off things from my list earlier in the day, am clear-headed and focused.

What inspired you to launch Nutritious Life and TNS?  

Since I was a little girl, I was interested in nutrition without even realizing it.  I played sports and had a natural interest in how the body works and fuels itself.  In seventh grade science class, I told my friend that I was craving almonds so my body must need Vitamin E.  I probably had no had idea what Vitamin E actually did but I had read it somewhere, and was interested enough to remember that fact. 

Fast forward to college, I continued to play sports and eat well.  A lot of my friends did not.  They drank Diet Coke, didn't eat healthfully, yet I was the one who gained the “Freshmen Fifteen”.  As a result, I became interested in how to fuel the body for performance but also how to be lean and fit.  After I graduated, I worked with Sports Illustrated and because it was owned by Time Inc., I could get my hands on all the magazines.  I remember sitting at my desk and going over every last word in Health Magazine.  In fact, I was so interested that I went back to school part-time and took nutrition courses at NYU.

To some extent the rest is history, but when I graduated I started working for an online health and wellness company and was counseling people; first at Equinox, and then privately.  At the same time, I was getting my business experience at a small start-up.  The start-up pulled me away from hard-core nutrition because it took so much of my time so I decided to take the business skills that I had gained and couple it with my passion for nutrition. Then I went for it.

I quit my job (at the start-up) and opened up my own practice called Body Fuel about fifteen years ago, which has since evolved into Nutritious Life.  My practice from day one encompassed the mantra of a nutritious life, and it being more than just food.  In fact, my first logo was an icon for stress (a brain) with an arrow going to a drop of water (hydration) to an arrow going to a bed (sleep)!

I created TNS to scale my practice throughout the country.  It started with a binder to keep myself accountable and to eventually train others.  Then I hired my first dietician, trained her, and then the binder evolved into the program that it is today.

How old were you when you started playing with food?

I talk about this with my mother all the time… My mom still has a recipe box and found all of these cards with recipes that I had written, even though some were make-believe like Lizard Stew!

In the second grade, I made a “cookie dough machine” for a school project.  My dad brought cardboard and paper towel rolls for me to make it.  I always think of that as my first recipe and foray into entrepreneurship.

What’s the first thing that you remember cooking?

Growing up I cooked with my mother who made so many great recipes!  I remember the ritual and experience more so than what we actually made; sitting on the counter in the kitchen and being with mom, and cooking dinner every night.   We started every meal with half a grapefruit, and a salad with Ken’s Italian dressing.  Every night we had a vegetable, starch, and a protein, followed by dessert.  It may not always have been focused on health per se but it was always balanced.  We also always sat down as a family.

An ingredient that you can’t live without?

Nuts and nut butter.

One ingredient that you avoid at all costs?

There is almost nothing that I do not like but I can’t stand cilantro. 

What do you listen to when you cook?

Everything from what I listened to when I was growing up to what the kids listen to now.  From Coldplay, Eminem, U2 to the Bee Gees to Taylor Swift.  I was rocking out to Katy Perry the other night and loved it.  My daughter took the opportunity to share… “Mom, that song is not good”.

Favorite vegetable?

That is hard…  I have to pick one?!  Mmm…. Let’s go with spinach.

Favorite fruit?

Blueberries

Last cookbook that you used?  What did you cook?

I recently made a great recipe from “It’s All Good” by Gwyneth Paltrow.  I made Two-Pan Chicken with Harissa, Preserved Lemons and Green Olives. I love olives.  In fact, it inspired me to make poached olives and they were so good.

Do you have any secret talents?

Hand-eye coordination.  If you throw something at me, I will catch it.  I can also pogo stick for hours.  I think I beat a neighborhood record when I was a kid.

If you could have dinner with anyone, who would it be and why?

Oprah.  Who wouldn’t want to sit with Oprah all night and pick her brain?

What is the number one piece of advice you would share with those looking to lead a Nutritious Life?

The combination of eating real, whole foods in conjunction with listening to your body, eating when you are slightly hungry, and to stop eating when you are slightly satisfied.  You’ll never have to count calories or worry about anything food related if you can master that powerful combo.

Remember it’s not just about the food.  It’s also important to pay attention to the other areas like focusing on stress reduction, sleep, and to not forget that they are just as important as exercise and food.

Ready to get started?  I put together a sample meal plan below with balanced and healthy recipes designed by Keri.  Just click on the recipe links below to get started with leading a Nutritious Life!

Breakfast: Morning Glory Muffins

Snack: Avocado Banana Smoothie 

Lunch: Chopped Salad with Tofu & Soy Nuts

Snack: Carrots & (10) Almonds

Dinner: Noodle Free Turkey Lasagna

*Note: Look out for GMO-free soy products.  Also, all recipes shared were created by Keri Glassman, Nutritious Life.

pregnantish: An interview with Andrea Syrtash

Andrea Syrtash, a real life superhero bridging the gap between her work and personal life, talks about fertility, relationships, and embracing the“ish”of things.

If ever there was the definition of Superwoman, Andrea Syrtash is it.  Andrea is a dating and relationship writer, online broadcaster and author.  She has been featured as an on-air personality on ABC’s The View, Good Morning America, NBC’s Today Show, and Oprah to name a few.  Andrea has also spoken at TEDxNavesink Makers on “How to Make Love (Outside the Bedroom)”, and is a regular contributor to Glamour.com.  To add to her growing list of credits, Andrea also recently founded pregnantish, the first-ever digital lifestyle magazine dedicated to providing resources for the fertility-challenged, inspired by her own and others' experiences associated with the trials and tribulations on the road to getting pregnant.

I had the opportunity to catch up with Andrea in between the filming of a TV pilot that she is hosting. Before kicking off our discussion, Andrea thoughtfully shared that both aspects of her career, being a relationship expert and the Editor-in-Chief of her new fertility-focused site pregnatish, go hand in hand. “Infertility is not just a medical issue, it's a relationship one. That's part of my goal with the site - to help singles/couples/LGBT navigate the personal and practical parts of the process.”

What made you decide to launch pregnantish?

As I've navigated my own infertility and fertility treatments for a number of years, I've searched far and wide on the Internet for a smart resource that wasn't clinical and it's been tough to find.  Information on this primarily has lived on parenting sites; and while these can be helpful, I felt it was time that we had our own lifestyle destination.  There are amazing medical and advocacy sites and we're not competing with them. We're trying to fill a different need. Instead of waiting for it, I decided to create it.

pregnantish is a great name, what is the inspiration behind it?

Over the last six years, I've undergone many fertility treatments, have been very hormonal, and told by my doctor to take it easy: not to drink alcohol or exercise too much, in the case I might be pregnant.  I've also had a positive beta test and have literally been pregnant for a time, and have lost the pregnancy.  Essentially, the inspiration behind the name is that it's a misconception, and you can in fact be a little bit pregnant!

Three adjectives you would use to describe pregnantish?

Supportive.  Smart.  Relatable.  Our tagline is ‘Real Talk About Fertility.’

What is your mantra?

When in doubt, choose love.

The moment(s) when you knew you were “ready” (to be a mom)?

Some women have always known they wanted to become a mom.  In my case, it happened a couple of years into my marriage.  I realized my partner (who is a teacher) would be a great dad, and that I was ready to expand our family. Once my niece was born, almost 4 years ago, it was even more solidified to me that I would love to raise a child.

You’ve written dozens of books on relationships; fertility can be taxing on a relationship. What is your number one piece of advice to couples on navigating the potential fertility minefield?

Good question!  Firstly, couples should give themselves a break.  This is such a tough thing to navigate, as infertility challenges relationships in the deepest way: the relationship you have with each other, with yourself, with your bodies, with your work, with your community, with your bank account and more.  I'd suggest that couples leave the lines of communication open, so they don't feel as alone.  I'd also suggest that they don't just look to each other for support.  Each person in a partnership has a right to feel feelings of frustration, despair, hopelessness, confusion and more.  Sometimes, though, it's too intense to rely on your partner to help you through this.  I'd suggest finding a trusted source - a friend, clergy member, or therapist, to help each or both of you so that you have the support you need.

You recently posted a meme that “Facebook is constantly reminding me that everyone is pregnant but me.” How do you recommend handling the news of a friend’s pregnancy announcement?

I have learned that you can hold two emotions: you can be happy for a friend and sad for yourself.  You can celebrate your friend's pregnancy news, but you aren't a bad friend if your heart sinks and you feel sad for yourself at the same time.  That's normal.  It's helpful to remember that we can hold both emotions.

Has there been a silver lining to your experience? 

Some people have said to me, 'All this was worth it so you could create pregnantish.'  I have mixed feelings about this.  I'm an eternal optimist, who sees the good in most situations; and yet, I wouldn't wish these 6 years of pregnancy losses, intense fertility treatments, invasive surgery, emptying the bank account, etc. on anyone!  It's been a very tough road.  The silver lining is that hopefully I can help others feel less alone as they navigate this, too.

Your go-to for managing stress?

I'm a glutton for massages!  I don't get them often, but every time I go, I feel better after and well taken care of.  The body goes through so much during treatment that it's important to practice self-care!  I also swim regularly.  This helps me alleviate stress.

Cook or order-in?

In my head I cook a lot.  In reality, I go out or take out more (part of NY living, it seems!).

Favorite feel-good food?

I enjoy foods with a surprise inside (dumplings, empanadas, ravioli, etc).

Last book you read?

I re-read Emotional Intelligence.  So good!

Who inspires you?

So many people inspire me (including my parents!); but in terms of a public figure, I'm inspired by Oprah.  A few years ago I hosted a great show for her network and it was a great honor.  I grew up watching her show religiously.  What I appreciate about her is her authenticity, her commitment to helping people live well and her drive.  She's created so many amazing opportunities and platforms, and has made the world a better place.  I hope to do (at least a fraction of!) the same with the media platform I have and the writing I do...

Best piece of advice that you have ever received?

The most important thing you can offer in a relationship is your presence.

Number one piece of fertility advice that you would like to share?

As much as possible, embrace the 'ish' of things.  Life isn't black and white, and some of the best life paths aren't expected or linear.  I've realized that it's important to know the what (that you want to be a parent) and it's okay to not yet know the who (biological or not), how or where of it."

To find out more about Andrea Syrtash visit pregnantish and sign up for the newsletter.  You can also follow along @pregnantish on Facebook and Instagram, and @pregnantishmag on twitter.